On Being Mad

I am sick again, barely one week into recovery from the last nasty sickness that came my way. It hit me late yesterday. Jeff takes Jaden to school for me on Wednesdays and told him that Mommy was sick and asked him to take extra special care of me today.

He woke up from nap before I did and here's how I woke up. First I hear his little voice in my ear saying "It's going to be night soon Mama. When are you going to wake up?" I barely heard him and didn't respond.

A few minutes later, I was wide awake to the sounds of Jaden banging away in his room on his toy workbench. Now part of me is proud that he was keeping himself occupied. We work so hard on this issue. But come on, the workbench? Seriously?

I called him back into the bedroom and it was obvious I was less than thrilled. I didn't yell at him or anything like that, but I said, "I can see that you were trying to wake me up because you chose a very loud activity" and, "it is not going to be dark soon, it is only 3 p.m."

Well lately he really falls apart when we are upset with him and today was no exception. He just dissolved into tears, which breaks my heart. He said "please don't be mad at me Mama."

I said, "Baby sometimes if you make a bad choice, people are going to be mad at you for a time. But even when I'm mad at you, I always love you with all my heart."

Then I was quiet and thought about it. I also hate it when people are mad at me. I feel exactly the same inside as Jaden expresses on the outside. I've just learned to hide it.

So I said, "it's a bad feeling when someone is mad at you huh?"

He said through his sniffles, "yes."

I felt so stumped seeing how I haven't really figured this out for my ownself yet in life.

So I asked him, "What do you think we can we do about those bad feelings?"

And my super-wise, natural therapist three-year-old said, "We just get through them Mama."

I smiled so huge and said, "Yes you are absolutely right. We just have to get through them."

And he finished it off by adding, "Or work it out. Just work it out. Right Mama?"

Oh my! How I love him!